People come to coaching for many reasons and unsurprisingly, with burnout rates on the increase, a popular one is to create more balance in their lives. These five steps help to put you back in control of how and where you spend your time.
Reckoning up…
1. For a couple of weeks track how many hours you’re spending on the different areas of your life: work; friends; family; life admin; exercise; time out to rest or do something you enjoy; and, if you’re in a relationship, the time you’re spending with your person. Getting the facts down onto paper or a screen can be a real eye opener and increase your motivation to make changes.
2. Once you’ve captured everything, ask yourself which area(s) you want to spend less time on.
What are you telling yourself?
3. When you know what it is or which they are, ask yourself:
“What am I telling myself about why I have to spend so much time doing X or with X?”
It’s important you understand the story you’re telling yourself about the areas of your life or people who are taking up more than their fair share of your time.
4. The next step is to challenge what you’re saying to yourself. Getting someone else to challenge you is better still. So, for example, is it really true that unless you put in a minimum 12 hour workday you’ll be next in line for redundancy? In a few organisations the answer might be a genuine yes but in many others, your manager is more likely to want you to put in a productive day’s work and then get some downtime.
Small steps
5. Finally, start doing something with what you discover. It doesn’t have to be drastic. It’s generally small gradual steps which lead to change. To begin with, try a week of giving something or someone less time and see how it feels. And remember to stay aware of any unhelpful or downright misleading beliefs you might have about why you have to put time into something that’s been sapping you.
And as out of balance as your life may feel at the moment, it’s also important not to beat yourself up about it. You’ll only waste energy which you could be spending on improving things.
© Michelle Bayley 2024
Find out more
Michelle Bayley is a Certified Professional Life and Career Coach based in Twickenham, South West London.
Read about Michelle’s career, life and executive coaching services, or contact Michelle to arrange a free consultation.
